This article examines the rise of “classical education” (CE) as an educational model in the context of contemporary educational culture wars in the United States. A traditionalist educational model especially favored by Christian schools and universities, CE builds upon the prestige of learning in the texts of the ancient Mediterranean. It is increasingly promoted by educators and politicians on the right as a tool for instilling “civic virtue” and for wresting American education from the grip of secularism and left-liberal ideology. This paper explores CE’s actors, its history, its pedagogical content, and its ideological underpinnings, to show that for its champions, CE is not simply a way to return to time-honored “classics,” but to instill a conservative cultural hegemony rooted in Christian nationalism.